Even Suns Need a Moon to Lean On

Day 354,

Being busy has been the new normal, at times I would think is my life revolving around the sun or is my life revolving around google calendar 😂😂. No matter what, I always made it a point to find time to write this letter, spend time with that one person I care the most. Amidst all the content that I consumed this week I came across this beautiful post, which stayed with me, because it echoed a quiet truth I’ve been living without realizing.

This hit me hard,
Because maybe the most important things aren’t always the loudest.
Maybe they sit quietly in the background,
never asking for time
but always worth making time for.

And if I’m honest…
I do make time.
Even in my busiest hours,
my heart seems to carve out space for something.
Or perhaps, someone.

Someone who doesn’t need to be named
but always feels present between my pauses.

In a pleasant Sunday evening, in one of those effortless conversations that go deeper than planned,
I heard:
“You’re very picky and particular.”

It made me smile.
Because these days, I am.

I no longer chase everything.
I guard my peace.
I pour myself only where I feel held.

I’m learning to protect my softness.
To stay close to people who feel like exhale.
To not chase
but choose.

But as usual the words hit me “You’re very picky and particular.”

“Words are the most powerful weapon we have, they can build, heal, break, or destroy. Choose them wisely.”

Now me being me, my brain got into thinking

In this fast, paced world where everyone’s rushing to fit in or stand out, where do we find ourselves?

Some people are the Moon.
Some are the Sun.

The Moon is gentle.
It doesn’t shine on its own , it reflects.
It waits for its moment, rises quietly,
never too much, never too loud.
It comforts, soothes, softens the dark.
Everyone loves the Moon.
But no one ever asks how it feels to constantly reflect someone else’s light.??

The Sun?
The Sun doesn’t ask for space.
It shows up fully, even when it scorches.
It doesn’t dim for comfort.
It wakes the world, demands attention,
and carries the burden of being misunderstood.

From the time we’re young, we’re taught to be moons:
Stay calm.
Don’t challenge too much.
Let others lead the way.
Shine, but not too bright.

But the world moves because of Suns.
People who dared to stand in their own fire.
People who made others uncomfortable, not out of ego, but out of honesty.

Gazing at the moon as I write this, I’m reminded not to rely on feelings alone, so let’s back this up with some solid data.

Boundaries make impact.

Psychologist Dr. Nedra Tawwab says: “Saying no is the most powerful form of self care and boundary,setting. It’s not aggression, it’s clarity.”

Studies from The Journal of Social Psychology found that assertive individuals are perceived as more competent and trustworthy, not less.

Neurological studies show our brains remember “disruptive” experiences better

The Von Restorff Effect proves that unusual, disruptive stimuli are remembered far more vividly than those that blend in.

• You remember the person who made a scene in a meeting, not the one who kept nodding.

In branding and marketing:

• Brands that disrupt markets (Apple, Tesla) are remembered more than safe players.

• A 2023 Nielsen report showed that brands associated with controversy or bold innovation had 37% higher recall rates.

Too much adjustment leads to burnout and identity loss

The American Psychological Association links chronic people, pleasing to:

• Increased anxiety

• Depression

• Emotional exhaustion

Dr. Gabor Mate has said: “The cost of fitting in can be your authentic self.”

A 2020 study in Frontiers in Psychology found that individuals who consistently suppress their desires to maintain social harmony had lower self esteem and higher risk of depressive symptoms.

Think about it:

• The Moon fits in.

• The Sun changes the clock.

• The Moon is admired.

• The Sun is respected, even when it’s blinding.

In every company, every team, there are those who reflect the culture and those who shape it.
And shaping is hard. It burns.
It invites feedback, resistance, even isolation.
But without the Sun, there’s no morning.

So ask yourself:
Are you reflecting so much that you’ve forgotten your own light?
Or are you burning true, even when it’s not easy?

Because the Moon is beautiful.
But the Sun is necessary.

And maybe the real courage…
is not in being liked,
but in being lit
clear, constant, and unafraid to shine in your own name.

And through it all, I’ve realized sometimes the brightest light comes from the quietest corners , like the gentle smile of someone who sees your fire and doesn’t ask you to dim it, but just loves you all the same.

Because even suns need a moon to lean on.

This is Krishna,

Signing off

Disclaimer:
That someone? Could be real, imaginary, poetic... or just really good at timing. Don’t overthink it. 😉